the first friday in november, i received my cancer diagnosis.
it’s one year later, cancer free.
the california buckeyes fall from their pods this time of year,
opening and dropping their fruit.
i carried a small chestnut buckeye in my pocket,
rubbing one sharp corner, believing i was shrinking my tumor away from my chest wall.
last month, unseasonal rains unexpectedly brought me to find this buckeye in the pocket of a fall jacket.
it was smooth and unwrinkled with a warmly oiled patina.
i compared it with one sitting out on the credenza, sucked in, shriveled up and wrinkled.
i love fall, i’m collecting buckeyes again, wrapping them in soft cloths and letting them hibernate through winter.
in the spring, i’ll have warm chestnut buckeyes to remind me,
nestle, nurture & believe.
Hurray to have this year behind you. You handled it all with such grace and courage. Beautiful image, the chestnuts.
Thank you, Diana, for your kind words and for being there for me.
Sending you much love and peace, my friend. May you find all manner of warmth, softness, and comfort in your pockets, home, family, and friends as you celebrate the journey you’ve traveled with grace and integrity.
Thank you Wendy. You were with me today! A Talking Heads song came on the radio and we were dancing Berkeley style in our college cottage on Old Grove 🙂
It seemed so wrong, that our beautiful, fit, young mother and friend had breast cancer. Glad that it is now vanquished and life is moving forward. All those descriptors still apply. Life has thrown you some curve balls, yet you show you are adept at catching them, dealing with them and throwing them back.
Aw Colette – thank you! Such nice words for this middle aged gal to read 😀